Dr. Samori Swygert: Resurrecting femininity in our black females
by Dr. Samori Swygert
We’re embarking on the unchartered journey of 2014. Every New Year multitudes of individuals make personal resolutions to improve themselves. I have a vision for black females.
I implore all female readers to be patient, receptive, and not prejudge what I’m saying until they’ve finished reading this article.
I want to see a renaissance of the current state of some of our black females. Female only indicates gender. I want to see more ladies and women. I’ve seen a generation of females that have lost touch with FEMININITY.
“When they reminisce over you my God!”
It’s my opinion that the entertainment industry has sabotaged our young black females. I remember when young ladies carried themselves with such grace, daintiness, and femininity. That encouraged and harkened black male chivalry and catering. Young ladies walked and talked with elegance. They conducted themselves with impeccable savoir faire, and exuded finesse. These characteristics were like honey to us young men, it crafted an image that men wanted to protect and was worthy of cherishing.
Currently, femininity is on a decline. The lack of both mature parental involvement is responsible for the degradation of our young black girls now. Many parents are not operating in a cohesive manner to convey healthy and proper modeling for our youth. To complicate matters, the entertainment industry has reprogrammed the psyche of our youth.
“Theres a stranger in my house”
Magazines, movies, talk shows, reality shows, social media (youtube, world star, etc), certain books, videos, and music have reversed engineered the wisdom and lessons of the matriarchs of the black family. True womanhood is becoming an archaic lost science. Much of what these forms of entertainment convey are externally focused, and lack the substance that develops the intrinsic quality of today’s females.
It’s difficult to watch more than 5 minutes of reality shows like Love and Hip Hop, Housewives, and Badgirls Club because I see womanhood mutate to disrespectful barbarianism and shallow, ego driven narcissism. There is a difference between being strong/independent and being bossy, loud and dismissive. This is similar to women saying they like a confident man and not a cocky/arrogant/obnoxious man.
Rewarding bad behavior
Society and the entertainment industry perpetuate the incompatibility between the black man and woman. THIS IS ACCOMPLISHED BY REWARDING BAD BEHAVIOR. Why are there TV shows that pay black women to be “ratchet”? Why do music videos objectify black women as strippers? Why do record labels encourage and endorse black female artists to basically strip in every video and pay them for raunchy dances and lyrics? Why must black females pose nude on front covers of King, GQ, Esquire, and Source Magazine to be considered “successful” or “empowered”?
Young black girls see the public attention and fanfare these superstars and video vixens receive. They then imitate it, in hopes to garner the same exact attention. The more lewd and provocative their behavior, the higher their pay and fame. This indoctrinates their psyche as the only method and means to get what they want in life. They either have to use sex or annoy someone into submission via rambunctious, combative, and bellicose behavior. Ultimately, many young girls are either dressing like hookers or resembling street thugs, and that’s not attractive!
The results are devastating. The black man and woman are being rendered socially and romantically incompatible. This is crippling black dating and the institution of marriage. The sanctity of marriage in the black community has been rendered dysfunctional and prone to divorce. We’re carrying hazardous subliminal behaviors that were skillfully implanted (like the movie Inception) in our subconscious into our marriages and households.
Our daughters are assuming the machismo, bravado, and brute character of men like: Sharkiesha, the girl that got an uppercut on the bus, Jerry Springer, or violent brawls on Love and Hip Hop. This bad behavior fuels female incarceration, because many are participating in acts considered criminal. Thus we are also fostering a generation of THE NEW JANE CROW!
A real woman knows how to smoothly mitigate conflicts and disagreements without “showing her a$s”. As a man, it is hard to even treat a female with chivalry, kindness, and respect when they don’t carry themselves in a manner worthy of chivalry. You can’t act like a man and be angry that I don’t treat you like a woman.
When a woman is super-independent (to the extreme), we don’t feel the need to treat, cater, woo, or bend over backwards because we assume you can do everything for yourself. Leave some room and work for us to do, allow us the opportunity to demonstrate our utility. Historically speaking, the only thing we’ve ever really had in America as blacks was that trustful bond between husband, wife, and children.
I envision a retreat back to that graceful paradigm to rediscover feminine allure, attraction, etiquette and beauty. Hollywood I’m not letting you dictate who my Queen is! We need our elder matriarchal leaders to reinstall the software into our black females. Ladies you are more than a piece of A$S, you are an ASSET!
I’m just expressing my feelings. I don’t know the innate intricacies of the female psyche. I don’t like finger pointing, it never yields resolution. Thus to be fair to my female readers, I’ll share my open letter I wrote to young black males here: http://kulturekritic.com/2013/11/news/samori-swygert-letter-younger-black-brother/
What are your thoughts?? Peace!